Hate Story

Hate Story

Hate Story appears on the Sid Kipper album Chained Melody

I hate my brother, I hate him like no other,

For years and years and years I've held that view;

And I don't mind betting, that if you ever met him,

Then you'd hate my brother too.

I hate the neighbours, my malice never wavers,

And my brother always says he shares my view;

And I know that it's true, if you lived where we do,

Then you'd hate the neighbours too.

I hate Knapton, where terrible things happen,

And I know that the neighbours share my view;

And if you lived in Trunch, where we're such a friendly bunch,

Then you'd hate Knapton too.

I hate Norwich, they're all as pale as porridge.

And I know my mates in Knapton share my view;

And if you'd ever been there, and seen the sordid scene there,

Then you'd hate Norwich too.

I hate Suffolk, they're a real pain in the buttocks,

And I know the whole of Norfolk shares my view;

If you saw the disorder, that occurs over the border,

Then you'd hate Suffolk too.

I hate London, they're hard as carborundum,

And all of us provincials share that view;

And if you'd ever heard, the way they say their words,

Then you'd hate London too.

I hate the French, with loathing so intense,

And everyone in England shares my view;

And if you went abroad, you'd see nothing to applaud,

And you would hate the French too.

I hate Yanks, the lot of them are cranks,

And all us Europeans share that view;

And if you ever should, eat what they describe as food,

Then you would hate Yanks too.

I hate you, you're not like me,

But I think I see a way that this could end;

The world will live as one, when the Aliens come,

Then we'll all be united hating them!