The Dumpling Song

The Dumpling Song

A Dumpling is a person from Norfolk - not a small dump. This song, assumed to derive from the pen of George Kipper, comes from the pre-multi-cultural, melting-pot era.

"It couldn't deride from the pen of George Kipper, because George always uses a pencil. He reckons that way you can always rub it out and deny all knowledge."

Sid Kipper.

The Dumpling Song appears on Sid's album Chained Melody

Come all of you stout Norfolk folk, and all the thin ones also,

For we must fight a foe as big as ever - if not more so.

For there's a threat we all must face, from Massingham to Mundham;

They are a most pernicious race, those dreadful folk from London.

But Dumplings all, no matter what,

Will always be the ones on top.

It is well known to Norfolk folk that Londoners have rabies;

They talk a foreign language and they eat each others' babies.

They think all birds are 'sparras', and the privy is a toilet;

They reckon Norfolk's all unspoilt, so then they come and spoil it.

Now we keep hearing, on the news, that London is so favoured;

If they believe that well, I mean, why don't they all just stay there?

They come and live in all our barns, creating homeless hens,

Then insult all our women folk by not seducing them.

It's not 'cos they complain like hell when we go spreading muck;

It's just that they don't have the sense to simply learn to duck.

It's not 'cos they are pale of skin, while we are ruddy faced -

It's just that now they've bought it all they think they own the place.

Now we won't burn their houses down, that's not the way for us;

We won't attack them in the streets - we can't abide a fuss.

But there's a way we've used before to get what we are needing;

Let's turn them into Norfolk folk by lots of interbreeding!

But Dumplings all, no matter what,

Will always be the ones on top.