The Roughton Wriggle Song

The Roughton Wriggle Song

"This is a song I used to do with my Partner In Crime, Dave Burland. You have to sing it with another person, or you get stuck after verse 1, because you've got no-one to ask you the questions in verse 2. I mean, you couldn't very well ask yourself, could you, because if you did you'd look a fool when it came to verse 3 and it become obvious that you knew the answers all along. Mind y ou, he surprised me by coming up with a fourth verse what gives more answers to the answers! That's how they are in his village of Barnsley, apparently - they won't take yes for a question.

A wriggle is a sort of silly question which you get a silly answer to, like 'What's got three legs but is always legless'. The answer to that is 'Nothing'. It used to be 'Albert Kipper', but since Albert died the wriggle doesn't work no more. Most of them don't work anyhow, because they never explain how the gooseberry got in the lift in the first place, never mind how it reached up to press the buttons. So all in all wriggles are just a way of making nonsense, and if you ask me there's plenty enough of that about already, thank you."

First Person

I gave my love a ring, that had no stones;

I gave my love a cherry, that had no bones;

I gave my love a chick, with no cry in;

I gave my love a baby, that had no end.

Second Person

How can there be a ring, that has no stones?

How can there be a cherry, that has no bones?

How can there be a chick, with no cry in ?

How can there be a baby, that has no end?

First Person

A ring when it's a signet, it has no stone;

And any blooming cherry, it has no bone;

A chick, when it is strangles, has no cry in;

Of babies, you'll agree, there is no end.

Second Person

But signets, by bird watchers, are often ringed;

And chicks on a Friday are often stoned -

They make no bones about it, drinking cherry bee,

And often end up having a little baby.

(The last verse of this song was collected by Dave Burland from a Barnsley version)